M2 MT AUDIT

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

SOME INTERESTING BLOOPERS - PART 3

The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut and handed to the pediatrician, who breathed and cried immediately.
The skin was moist and dry.
Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed.
The patient lives at home with his mother, father, and pet turtle, who is presently enrolled in day care three times a week.
Bleeding started in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los Angeles.
Exam of genitalia was completely negative except for the right foot.
The patient was to have a bowel resection. However he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
Coming from Detroit, this man has no children.
Examination reveals a well-developed male lying in bed with his family, in no distress. (Punctuation does matter !!)
Patient was alert and unresponsive.
When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

Monday, March 9, 2009

SOME INTERESTING BLOOPERS - PART 2

The patient has no previous history of suicides.
Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.
The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
She is numb from her toes down.
While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
The skin was moist and dry.
Patient was alert and unresponsive.
Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
I saw your patient today, and he is still under our car.
Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
Skin: Somewhat pale but present.
The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
Patient is married, but has no other abnormalities.

Monday, March 2, 2009

SOME INTERESTING BLOOPERS !

D: The patient has a mildly stooped posture.
T: The patient has a mildly stupid posture.

D: The patient is interested in scar revision.
T: The patient is interested in scary vision.

D: She avoids shellfish because of a reaction in the past.
T: She was selfish because of the reaction in the past

D: The patient denies any blackout or seizures.
T: The patient denies any black cat procedures.

D: The patient had 2+ pitting edema around the ankles.
T: The patient had 2 pus-spitting edema around the ankles.

T: ...older male who was sitting up with his right hip flexed at 45 degrees, externally rotated, and his knee flexed 45 degrees. He was moaning with exploration, but that is his usual.

D: Strongly encouraged smoking cessation.
T: Strongly encouraged smoking sensation.

D: Skin cancer of the face removed with Mohs, and hemorrhoidectomy.
T: Skin cancer of the face removed with hemorrhoidectomy.

D: The patient had erratic periods.
T: The patient had erotic periods.

D: skin ellipse
T: skinny lips

D: His hip pain was radiating into his back, sometimes also into his chest region.
T: His hip was radiating into his back, sometimes also into his chest region.

D: The patient was scanned again
T: The patient was caned again

D: The patient is allergic to adhesive tape.
T: The patient is allergic to a piece of cake.

D: below-knee amputation
T: baloney amputation

D: thecal sac
T: fecal sac

D: end-expiratory wheezing.
T: index battery wheezing.

D: but the patient hoped that it would heal.
T: but the patient popped me till I feel.

D: I prescribed Bactrim
T: I prescribed bathroom